LAND and horses!!!! I went to S. Thar's team penning and man, it makes me miss horses and just being out in the country! I need that and I want to raise my boys OUT of town! SO, now what? DO I sell my house? Do I stay in this shithole town or get out and take a HUGE cut in pay? WHERE do I want to be? all I know is I want to be out of town enough to have land! and I don't think I want to buy land from my dad in Sundance because I don't want him to hold that over my head if I am not nice enough to "Her" ,,,, so, I will wait, pray about and wait and see what God lays on my heart about WHERE to live! Meanwhile, I will keep getting house ready to sale, If I stay I can enjoy the improvements!
With you God, ALL things are possible!
Last night SUCKED! I talked to CN for about 1.5 hours... I got him to "sort of" admit that this break up was really what "he wanted" but he kind of "made me decide it" because he said he didn't want to "hurt anyone." WHAT the hell,,, I shouldn't be mad but I sort of am. Why didn't he let me stay broke up with him OCT of 06? OMG! I am so upset about my BOYS! They didn't deserve to get "led on" for over a year and then lose another man they loved! AGH! THIS totally sucks! anyway, I don't know what else we really said, it all just made me CRY like all night! I am so pathetic!
I sort of want to see what else is out there (NOT that I am ready for that!) but the other part of me just wants CN back! Ya know, we really didn't have that bad of a relationship! I guess we just struggled with the merge,,, that was a thorn stuck in our side and I was really ready to move on to the next step or "NOT!" SO, here we are!
I keep reading things on the internet... lots of things say, "CLEAN BREAK" no contact! SO, here I am ignoring his text he sent me!
I got Jordin Sparks new CD, its REALLY good! I sent CN the link to her Video, Tattoo, which is about moving on when you still love but you just gotta move on,,, WOnder what he'll think,,,
Last night after we hung up, I deleted his number from my phone and all of his friends/family #'sthat I don't need anymore! I decided I need to totally disconnect, I can't sorta talk/text.,,, Yesterday, (getting to talk to him 3 times) was harder on me than if we just hadn't talked at all... and also I think Ineed tostart playing hard to get,,, and see if that makes him want me back or just lets him leave quicker! AGH! THIS SUCKS! I love him but I don't know what's best!I might be going crazy and I am so depressed but the websites/articles say that is normal during a breakup!
人生第一个跳跃
刚上小学一年级时我6岁,比别的孩子小一两岁,胆子很小,非常腼腆.有一次,年轻的体育老师突发奇想,带我们到公园里去上体育课.第一个环节就是爬墙.公园的墙很高,一个同学是无法爬上去的,必须有人当人梯,几个人一组,轮流踩着同学的肩膀一个个爬过墙头,老师将最后一个同学抗过墙头.接下来的考验是跨越溪流,溪流很宽,水流也很急,轻松的一跳是跳不过去的,一定要助跑在加上相当的勇气才能跨过去,很多男同学都不敢跳,不得不穿着鞋,手拉手地淌过溪流,因为溪流中的石头很滑,有的同学站不稳,被湍急的溪流冲倒在水里.轮到我过溪流了,我穿的是奶奶手工做的布鞋,我不想把鞋弄湿.在当时的形势下不知道哪里来的勇敢,我经几米的助跑后飞跃过这湍急的溪流,结果我的鞋子一点都没湿着,在下面攻碉堡时跑动就很灵活,能出色地完成任务.老师总结这节课时专门表扬了我,因为在老师同学的眼里我这个脆弱胆小的同学,关键时刻却表现出了超常的勇气和胆量.
40 年后我回忆当时的情景,那一节体育课还能清晰地呈现在我的脑子里,那个简单的跨越并不简单,那是一个小女孩挑战自己,超越自我的难得机遇, 可以说在这短短半秒中6岁的我完成了一次心灵的跨跃.因为从那以后我认为我不比别人差,有时还能做到别人做不到的事情.这种自信心的获得对人生太重要了.而且越早获得越好.我十分感激我的体育老师,是他给了我这样一个重新认识自己的机会.很多腼腆胆小的孩子都十分需要这样一个机会来证明自己,完成心灵的跨跃.
Today is my last day of vacation. I'd like to have some more time, but, impossible. For some part, I feel good going back to school, and for the other, I don't because going back to school means going back to teachers excessively talking, tests, and worst of all, homework. Me and my 2 best friends always talk about all the boring homework our teachers give us. Homework is our primary subject of our discussions.
The part where I feel good about going back to school, is that the faster time will seem, and before I know it, I will be in college, with a job, and so on. And that is my big, perfect dream. To go to college, but not in this somehow interesting place, Arizona, I'd like to go to Europe. Perhaps Italy once again. And study, whatever I decide I'd like to study, and graduate, and all that. I know, that to do that, I have to study, work hard, and do hw, but, well, I do it. I know, I'm talking about this alot, but, I still do it, with the thought that if I don't, I won't get my dream come true.
大宝学钢琴半年多了，进展挺快。现在每每陪她练琴，都觉得是个不小的负担。可是我还是软硬兼施的坚持着。原因有几个：1。学琴锻炼脑子。且不说要记住那些小蝌蚪，光是左右手的配合，就让很多大人觉得很困难了。同时看左右手的谱子，并按其不同节奏弹奏，对大脑一定有帮助。2。学琴培养自律。现在的孩子都是家长的宝贝，很多孩子都是自由散漫的。可是由于每周都要上课，然后下周还要回课，所以，不坚持练琴肯定不行。大宝每天吃过晚饭，就自然走到钢琴边，知道这是必须的任务了。3。学琴培养情商。在优美的乐曲中，孩子们感受到美和爱，感受到老师和妈妈的关心，感受到大自然中很多美好的事物，心情自然很愉悦！这对自己和周围的人都是很有好处的。4。学琴培养意志力。别看才学了半年，现在很多曲目我都赶不上她了。每每遇到新的难点，大宝也会哭，觉得自己老弹不好很痛苦。但是，每次我都惊奇的发现，她在第二天会有很大的进步。问其原因，她说中午午睡的时候，自己在被子里面背谱子。她知道要加倍努力，就能克服困难。不轻言放弃，这一点，我很欣慰！
所以，虽然不想她将来能成为'朗朗'，但是学琴的过程我还是很满足的。将来大宝一定会受益于她的付出。
Here are all katties accounts ...
#1 : Edailydiary.com : Kattie9954/sunflower
#2 : Yahoo(s) :
Chocaholic9954/99549963
Gurlsxrulex3/123123123
#3 : Aim(s) :
Chocaholic9954/99549963 ... ???
#4 : Youtube : xoxkattiexox9954/99549963 ... ???
#5 : Google : kattie9954/99549963
#6 : Myspace
gurlxxrulex3@yahoo.com/99549963kk
one's from oman. the other's from israel. one's muslim, the other's a jew. two men - one heart to fill. me? neither - my faith - christianity. my personal life is certainly becoming more and more interesting.
do i love oman? or do i love israel? or am i still haunted by the past and that i shouldn't think about love anymore?
what's my calling should truly be kept under-wraps - because right now i don't think i wanna know... not now.
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cancermoonchild 45, Female, California, USA - 32 entries
apitamac 58, Female, Indiana, USA - 8 entries